How to Quickly and Easily Deal With Rude People

Where I live there seems to be a a growing population of rude and vulgar people. And no matter how hard I wish for things to change it is not going to happen. It is up to me to change how I think and feel about these people. The same applies for you.

1. What does it mean when someone is rude?

Your initial angry reaction may be to think the person is a moron but that only makes matters worse as it will comes across in the way you talk.

I prefer to view such behavior as evidence that the person is doing the best he can with what he has. This belief makes it easier for you to accept the person even though you may not like his approach.

Look for the good in people and you are a lot more likely to find it.

2. Is it your fault?

When you encounter vulgarity it is worth pausing to ask yourself have you encouraged this behavior. Maybe you played along with this gutter talk in the past so the person thinks you do not mind it.

Or perhaps you have done something that has annoyed the person so much they cannot control their anger and annoyance.

In either of these cases it is best to slowly lead the person back to a polite discussion. You can do this by asking highly specific questions that force the person to slow down and think before replying.

If you honestly did not do anything to encourage the rudeness you are clearly dealing with someone who habitually talks in this way.

Unless you can change the person you just have to accept him as he is.

3. What can you do?

Ultimately you have a choice - avoid dealing with vulgar people where possible or join them! Only joking!

Seriously though if you cannot avoid them you need to remember how to take charge of conversations. Plus you need to ensure you remain strong and unaffected by their manner.

In the meantime you can achieve quite a lot by distinguishing between the person and the way they deliver their message to you.

Look beyond their words to the real message they are trying to convey.

We all have a bad day now and again maybe you just bumped into them while they were stuck at a low point.

About The Author

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available for a limited time only at: http://www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com/report.htm

peter1510@hotmail.com

More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Coaching Information:

Related Articles

The Student Who Knew Too Much
This article is for those of you who coach or mentor. Does this sound familiar? "Can't I just try to mail or email, do I really have to call" "I was thinking I could wait to get business cards" "I wanted to be successful first, before I start to market or network" "Why do I have to do it that way, I thought I could do it this way" I could go on, but I think you get the picture.
How to Choose the Right Coach for You
So you want to hire a coach but with so many choices it's easy to feel overwhelmed. How do you find the coach that is right for you? It can seem like a daunting task so here are some guidelines to help you make the right decision for you.
Use a Journal for Self-Discovery and Self-Expression
As a therapist, I often suggest to clients that they explore their feelings and thoughts by keeping a journal. Sometimes clients ask for a bit of direction with this process.
Every Obstacle Always Presents an Opportunity
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock.
Success Coaching - What Bill Gates and You Should Have In Common
He was just a teenager, but he was already displaying the powerful habits that would one day make him a billionaire.I had to dart down to Atlanta on Monday for a business meeting with a partner of mine and grabbed a new book to read on the plane.
Choosing The Perfect Coach
So, you're ready to start coaching. You either have some issues that you think a coach can help you overcome, or you just think it's time for a quality of life tune-up.
Walt Disney, the Inspiration to Form a Better Life?
You, like many others, may have come to this article because you want more from life. In this sense, you and I may be alike because we're searching for greater happiness and a stronger sense of fulfillment.
Coaching: YOU Can Improve Your Organizations Performance
GOOD BUSINESS COACHING: Clearly, the right kind of coaching can alter a team's or an organization's performance. The implication for business is that if you create a climate of coaching in any organization, you can produce performance that exceeds your expectations - and you won't have to change the people to do so.
How to Control Your Anger: Retreat and Think Things Over
How to Control Your Anger: Retreat and Think Things OverJim and Mary Jones loved each other deeply, but often went into horrific verbal battles over any number of issues. They would argue and yell for hours, often into the night, leaving both of them exhausted, emotionally disconnected, hurt and resentful toward each other.
How to Adopt a Losing Attitude
We have all heard the expression, "Where your heart is?, your treasure will be also." Allow me to modify this tried and true wisdom, to create an equally valid point: "Where your thoughts are, your hips will be also.
Great Advice
It never ceases to amaze me that every time I give a speech, do a seminar, or talk with people one-on-one, I get inundated with questions seeking the almighty answers to all that ails them. However, when I press them to come up with an answer to their own situation, they usually respond by offering their own solution right back to me.
Plug in Your Systems for Success
Have you ever noticed that so many of us who work diligently and ethically rarely achieve our objectives? And, why is it that those who-seemingly-work half as hard and half as long experience one success after another?The answer is twofold; successful people succeed because they implement proven, systems for success. Secondly, successful people have mastered the art of making time, work for them.
Creating Supportive Environments
I'm writing this on my laptop in a Cosi café in Dupont Circle in Washington, D.C.
Profitable Idea Generation in 4 Steps Using Improv
A large percentage of business are stuck, tied to narrow ways of thinking about themselves and their products. In the business environment you can't be stuck and survive.
Leadership Coaching at Gettysburg
The battle at Gettysburg is one of the most notable events in U.S.
Drop and Gimme Ten!
Every one of us have dreams, desires and goals that we put on the shelf. In front of them are a litany of excuses -- but not one reason -- why they aren't being pursued.
Is Your Attitude Destroying Your Health?
A positive attitude may bring good health and success. If you have ever read any book about success you will discover how an optimistic attitude will keep you healthier and tremendously increase your chances of success.
D.I.S.C.I.P.L.I.N.E.
What does this word really mean anyway? According to Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, 10th Edition, discipline, as a noun, is defined primarily as punishment. My, but that has a harsh ring to it.
Dont Settle
Settling is about not embracing what is best for you, and accepting what you really don't want. When you settle, you accept less than you deserve.
Coaching for Success
Coaching is perhaps the most effective method of increasing performance available to managers, team leaders, and colleagues. This article defines coaching and outlines a process for effective coaching.